The Greatest Side Hug Ever

              First things first, I would like to say that I love MAP Testing. Being the unknowing first year teacher that I am, I wasn't sure what to expect.  But now, after having almost completed the MAP, I think it's awesome. Maybe not the actual test itself, but the giving of the test has been great! I get to test the kids in the morning and relax and take it easy with them in the afternoon. We’ve had time to do so many fun things! The best part of it all is that I have even more time to spend on relationships with my students. This afternoon I had my greatest “teaching” moment yet, and it happened while we were making kites.

   As my students were finishing up a project (they made Kite Glyphs, where you add details according to your life. For example, add 3 bows if you are an only child). Anyway, as they were finishing one of my boys, I will call him “Brad” brought his kite up to my desk where I was working on my very own kite. He started comparing and contrasting the things that were a like and different about our lives based off our kites. I was shocked that he was so interested in my life because all year Brad has acted emotionally detached from me and most of his classmates. Seeing his interest I tried not to get too excited (in fear of shutting him down) so I kept on coloring while talking with him. He’d ask me a question about my kite and I’d ask him one back. Finally he said something about this older brother and how he’d just gotten out of jail. Brad has a pretty rough home life.  So I asked him a few questions about why his brother went to jail and then we had a talk about learning from other people’s mistakes and not following in their footsteps. He told me that he didn’t want to be like his brother and that he wanted to be better. I told him that I was proud of him for making that choice and that I loved him.

   After a few more minutes of talking it was time for us to clean up and get ready to head to the bus line. As we were walking out the front doors of the school I thought I would take a chance and ask him for a hug. I knew even asking meant I was taking a major risk, because usually he won’t even give me a high five. If I pat him on the back he jerks away and hides. But today was different. I said, “Brad, can I please have a side hug?” He smiled at me and then quickly slipped his arm around my waist and gave me a little squeeze. I thanked him and then he headed for his bus as I tried to fight back my tears.

              I don’t know what tomorrow will hold for me and Brad. I predict that he will walk in my room like usual, head down and no greeting. But for now I am celebrating the growth we had today. I’m basking in the warmth of this moment. And I will forever hold on to that little side hug. It meant the world to me. I love Brad and I pray that he will always make the right choice.

Lord, Teach Me to Pray

     My small group just finished reading the book Lord, Teach Me to Pray in 28 Days by Kay Arthur. It is a good book and I didn't realize just how much I had learned from it unitl tonight. After a wonderful evening with my small group friends, I wondered why I was feeling restless with God. I felt defeated and unwanted (not by any of my bible study memebers) but with other things. So I decided to get out my prayer journal and pray. 
    Originally when I started writing I was going to pray for my future husband and ask God why it's taking SOOO long for him to get here...but as I started writing I remembered "how to pray" As I wrote, my pen kept flowing and not one word was what I had intended to write originally. Through my prayer God showed me some areas of my heart that need work. I decided to blog about it and include the prayer below so that it can be a reminder to me and hopefully a reminder to others that God is there. Prayer is our connection to him. This is my favorite quote from the teach me to pray book:
       "Someone has said that prayer and the Word are like two wings of a bird- both are necessary if the bird is to fly. And both are necessary if we want to soar in our relationship with our heavenly Father."

Dear Lord,

               Please help me! You are great and mighty to save and I need you to rescue me. I have seen your miracles in my own life and in the lives of others that I love. I know you care for and love me more than anything (I’m your child). You don’t need me, You WANT me. And honestly at times, I don’t want you or your plans, but I know that I NEED you. I’m nothing without your love. You are the maker of heaven and earth. Ruler and creator of ALL, even me. You took the time to create me, even though you knew I’d be sinful and filthy, you made me anyway, because you love me. You designed me and set a purpose for my life. When I stop and think about it I am humbled and awestruck. How can I do anything but praise you? Why do my lips, the very same lips that praise you with one breath turn and slander another brother or sister with the next? Why do I seem to think that my plans are better than yours? I know your plans are higher and bigger and better than anything I could ever dream of. But still I think I know best. I look at my life and the blessings you’ve poured out on me and I still question you. What is my problem Lord? Why am I so selfish and consumed by the things I don’t have? I am a spoiled little brat. I want everything done my way and in my timing. And while I may not through myself on the floor in a tantrum when things don’t go my way, I sure am good at pouting. In fact, it’s actually something I used to take pride in. How sad is that?? Pride itself is sinful. But I was taking pride in the fact that I was so good at pouting to get my way! Like I said, spoiled brat.

                        God, your word tells me that you will grant me the desires of my heart if I will trust in you. For the longest time I was manipulating your word so that I could say, “Ok God I trust you, now will you please give me what I want?”  But I have learned in time that if I fully trust you, my hearts desires will begin to line up with your will for me. I’m sorry God for twisting your words.

                        My prayer tonight is that I continue to grow you will continue to break me of my selfishness. Continue to show me when I try to change your promises to fit my circumstances. Enlighten me with your love and fill me with your joy. Let me be a shining light for you. I want to love you and desire you more than anything else in my life. You alone are worthy. You alone are enough. Forever.

Love,

Janae

Pretty Little Liars

The following is a conversation between me and two of my students today:

This is what was said as I was talking with one of my boys about him calling a little girl in my class a liar (I’ll call him Tommy and her Sarah).

Tommy- “I think it’s fair that I called her a liar, because she called me a bad name first!”

Me- “Well, just because someone says something mean to you doesn’t make it ok to call them a name back. But what name did she call you?”

Tommy-“Uh…well... what was it? Oh yeah, she called me…a pretentious jerk!”

Me-“Oh, a pretentious jerk? Really??

Tommy-“Yeah, that’s what she said.”

Separate conversation – me to Sarah

Me-“Did you call Tommy a bad name?”

Sarah-“No Miss Bass I didn’t’.”

Me-“Are you sure you didn’t say anything mean? You didn’t call him anything like a pretentious jerk??”

Sarah-“No Miss Bass I promise. First of all, I don’t know what that word even means, and second I don’t say things like that because I’m a Christian.”

Haha, you just have to love the stuff they come up with. They are so cute. Sometimes it’s hard as the teacher to know what to believe (however, not in this particular case).  For the record Tommy did admit to me later that he made that up. But it got me thinking a lot about lying. It’s crazy how many times a day I catch my students in lies, from talking in the hallway, to writing mean notes about other students and then signing someone else’s name. And these are only 3^rd graders. Lying isn’t something we are trained to do. Ask the two year old who snuck a cookie when their mom wasn’t looking and 9 times out of 10 they will skew the truth. Lying is something we must be trained NOT to do.

I try so hard to instill in my kids that honesty is the best policy. The other day I heard one of my girls say, “you should just tell the truth, because then your punishment will be less.” Yes, many times this is a perk to telling the truth, but it should not be our motive for being honest. We should tell the truth because it’s the right thing to do. So in Miss Bass’ class (and hopefully through their lives) honesty is the BEST policy!

“What is desired is a steadfast love, and a poor man is far better than a liar.”

–Proverbs 19:22

“Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put on the new self, which is being renewed in the knowledge after the image of its creator.”

-Colossians 3:9